What do dreams mean?

Have you ever wondered what dreams mean? I would love to know what my wild dreams are to reflect. I was in darkness other than small moments of drifting to the present to hear Dr. Zuege say “Let me see that smile.” or hearing my mom say “I don’t know she is doing that, I can’t even do that.” This was in reference to me raising my eyebrows as that was the only way to communicate.

My darkness lasted about 6 weeks from my admission and during this time I had the weirdest dreams. Weird, but there was a theme. I was represented as a cow and there was a BBQ involved. Growing up I was a shy person with self-esteem and self-confidence issues, so one dream had me at a BBQ and I obviously did not fit in with the crowd. Next thing I knew,  I was being prepared for the BBQ!  The crowd was teasing/bullying me which hurt me and I didn’t know why I was being treated this way. So I prayed to God to be there with me as I felt hurt and scared. I closed my eyes for the pain to stop. A peace came over me as the people go on to BBQ me. I no longer felt scared and knew I would be okay. Then I would have a drifting moment of the present or begin a new dream with the same scenario with me ending up in a BBQ and me praying to God asking for protection. This roller coaster of imagination went on until I remember waking up on Halloween seeing my nurse Chelsea wearing a black shirt with eyes on it with the words - ICU. Hard not to smile seeing that shirt.

I was happy my future dreams were less vivid and scary. After Halloween, I had more “in present” moments but was obviously quite tired and slept much of the day too. I still try to understand why such vivid dreams and the reasons behind them. One thought was that each dream in the end had me praying to God for protection - could my faith be tested with these scenarios?

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