Walk in another person’s shoes
One of the things that frustrates me about the English language is multiple words sound the same (there, their, and they’re; or to, too and two). Then there are 2 words that have opposite meaning of one another. For me, those two words are Empathy and Sympathy; as I seem to get mixed up remembering their meanings. So went on Google to find the definitions:
Empathy - the ability to understand and share the feeling of others
Sympathy - feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s misfortunes ‘
Now you are probably wondering where I am going with this. Everybody knows that saying, “Walk in another person’s shoes to understand their feelings”. I am now in a position to say that I am walking in their shoes. I am speaking about being considered “disabled”.
Thinking of growing up, I do not remember too many people I encountered went at school or in my circle of friends that had obvious physical disability. Probably my main encounter came when my sister Kathryn became a full arm amputee due osteogenic sarcoma in her humerus bone with mets to her thoracic spine. Challenges she faced as a teenager were undaunting I am sure. Through my sister, observing how she overcame her challenges, I gained a “sympathy” to what other people are impacted when they lose their arm. Doing their long hair; putting on clothes, zipping up their jeans and driving a car. Before my sister passed away, she had overcame those exact challenges. (You can see where I gain some of my strength and inspiration from)
Now it’s my turn to walk in the shoes who is not only wheelchair bound but is unable to use her limbs for daily life. Now I am having “empathy” of someone in my situation. There are barriers to overcome in life of course but being in a wheelchair gives you an appreciation of how many barriers there are truly out there for wheelchair bound citizens. Standard door widths - wow that was mind blowing as it never crossed my mind when I was able body. I have an oversized wheelchair as weight just under 300 lbs now. Due to extra width to my chair, it was prevented me to sit in my facility lounge room, the sun room, the flex room of the dining room area for meetings or where you and your loved ones to go to eat a meal instead of your bedroom, and not even the salon on the main floor (the lady has to come to my room to cut my hair). My last encounter facing this issue was last November, where my friend Karen and I went to Market Mall for an eye appointment. I was able to get into the store but not the eye examination room. So to this day (January 16, 2019), I still haven’t been able to get my eyes examined for glasses. Before leaving the mall, I wanted a few things from Shoppers Drug Mart; but unfortunately I wasn’t able to get into the store. The security bars at the entrance prevented me get into the store as my wheelchair was too wide. I was lucky Karen was able to get my things for me.
One thing we can take advantage of, that basically you can find transportation of some kind especially in a city the size of Calgary. Yes that is true. Some of the buses have a retractable lift and fold up chairs so a wheelchair can get on and off. There was wheelchair accessibility taxis/vans and small buses. What the Foothills recreational therapy team didn’t know that there was a width restriction for wheelchairs. Thinking nothing of it, we set myself up with Access Calgary, made our first encounter only to have it cancelled as my chair was too wide. Devastating - the possible realization I will be restricted to whatever facility I will be sent until I will be able to walk again or get a smaller width wheelchair. Foothills has a wonderful mechanic that assists the team with their wheelchairs etc. His name PJ and found out that by removing the hand wheels on the outside of the wheelchair, I could use Access Calgary. Relief - I can still enjoy the things I used to enjoy again.
With tremendous support from friends, they have helped me find devices/tools to help me maximize my quality of life. Devices such a holder for my mouth stick that I use for communication; a water bottle holder to attach to my wheelchair; a cellphone holder so that I can end a call after leaving a message or text someone back who doesn’t have an iPhone and using wifi plugs and iPad apps to regain some of my independence back.
Looking forward in 2019 what other barriers/challenges that I may overcome.
Empathy - the ability to understand and share the feeling of others
Sympathy - feelings of pity and sorrow for someone else’s misfortunes ‘
Now you are probably wondering where I am going with this. Everybody knows that saying, “Walk in another person’s shoes to understand their feelings”. I am now in a position to say that I am walking in their shoes. I am speaking about being considered “disabled”.
Thinking of growing up, I do not remember too many people I encountered went at school or in my circle of friends that had obvious physical disability. Probably my main encounter came when my sister Kathryn became a full arm amputee due osteogenic sarcoma in her humerus bone with mets to her thoracic spine. Challenges she faced as a teenager were undaunting I am sure. Through my sister, observing how she overcame her challenges, I gained a “sympathy” to what other people are impacted when they lose their arm. Doing their long hair; putting on clothes, zipping up their jeans and driving a car. Before my sister passed away, she had overcame those exact challenges. (You can see where I gain some of my strength and inspiration from)
Now it’s my turn to walk in the shoes who is not only wheelchair bound but is unable to use her limbs for daily life. Now I am having “empathy” of someone in my situation. There are barriers to overcome in life of course but being in a wheelchair gives you an appreciation of how many barriers there are truly out there for wheelchair bound citizens. Standard door widths - wow that was mind blowing as it never crossed my mind when I was able body. I have an oversized wheelchair as weight just under 300 lbs now. Due to extra width to my chair, it was prevented me to sit in my facility lounge room, the sun room, the flex room of the dining room area for meetings or where you and your loved ones to go to eat a meal instead of your bedroom, and not even the salon on the main floor (the lady has to come to my room to cut my hair). My last encounter facing this issue was last November, where my friend Karen and I went to Market Mall for an eye appointment. I was able to get into the store but not the eye examination room. So to this day (January 16, 2019), I still haven’t been able to get my eyes examined for glasses. Before leaving the mall, I wanted a few things from Shoppers Drug Mart; but unfortunately I wasn’t able to get into the store. The security bars at the entrance prevented me get into the store as my wheelchair was too wide. I was lucky Karen was able to get my things for me.
One thing we can take advantage of, that basically you can find transportation of some kind especially in a city the size of Calgary. Yes that is true. Some of the buses have a retractable lift and fold up chairs so a wheelchair can get on and off. There was wheelchair accessibility taxis/vans and small buses. What the Foothills recreational therapy team didn’t know that there was a width restriction for wheelchairs. Thinking nothing of it, we set myself up with Access Calgary, made our first encounter only to have it cancelled as my chair was too wide. Devastating - the possible realization I will be restricted to whatever facility I will be sent until I will be able to walk again or get a smaller width wheelchair. Foothills has a wonderful mechanic that assists the team with their wheelchairs etc. His name PJ and found out that by removing the hand wheels on the outside of the wheelchair, I could use Access Calgary. Relief - I can still enjoy the things I used to enjoy again.
With tremendous support from friends, they have helped me find devices/tools to help me maximize my quality of life. Devices such a holder for my mouth stick that I use for communication; a water bottle holder to attach to my wheelchair; a cellphone holder so that I can end a call after leaving a message or text someone back who doesn’t have an iPhone and using wifi plugs and iPad apps to regain some of my independence back.
Looking forward in 2019 what other barriers/challenges that I may overcome.
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